getting over it...

I have to find a way to deal with the stress in my life. It has begun to affect my health, and that is just not cool. I love my children and my husband, but I let everything get to me. The real problem is me, and I think I am finally starting to realize that. I have to get myself in order. I need to take it day by day, and not look at the big picture as much. If I can do the things I need to do today, then I have accomplished much. One day at a time is how I should do it….now the only problem is doing it.

I’m sick of bullshit. I’m sick of fake people. I’m sick of being driven crazy by people. If I had finished school, I’d have a job that I loved, and I’d be surrounded by educated, mature people…instead of uneducated abusers of the English language who only got where they are because of who they know.

I don’t mean for this to be a blog full of bitching and complaining, but that is how it has seemed to turn out. When I am reminded of my mistakes every day, I just get frustrated.

Until I know that I have no reason to worry about my health, I will worry and be stressed and scared, and think about all the things that could possibly be wrong with me. I hate feeling this way, and I think deep down, I know I’m fine…it’s just all the waiting on the tests results that really sucks. I hope everything is okay…I’m not sure I could deal if it’s not.

I think that if something seriously was wrong, then I would have worse symptoms. I don’t know if I’m just telling myself that to help me feel better or not. I tend to over react and get all crazy over things, and I am trying to stay calm. I will deal with whatever happens. It’s better to know, I guess.